Many people use a list at the store to remember to purchase ingredients. Likewise, many people use a list at the doctor’s office to remember to ask questions.

Known as “grocery lists” or “laundry lists,” Primary Care Providers (PCPs) are quite familiar with these lists. Personally, I’ve seen them typed out as small essays complete with check boxes and bullet points, and written on the back of old envelopes (some even with a spot of blood from checking a blood sugar at the time of writing it), and even as a phone call to a family member in the middle of the office visit “just to make sure they didn’t forget anything.” The listed items can range from updates in family history, to symptoms of chest pain, to wonders about something they read online.

Regardless if you are a healthcare provider or a patient, you know this list.

To be transparent, these lists are usually not a PCP’s favorite part of the job. The lists take time to review – often more time than what is available in a single visit. And they are full of surprises, which we often aren’t adequately prepared to discuss.

Nevertheless, this list is still very important to individual healthcare. It is foundational to the patient’s story. Often, it’s the only reason they are sitting in that chair. It also tells what this patient fears and what they value. It can shape a treatment plan that uniquely fits their risk tolerance if we let it. Potentially most important of all, simply listening and not dismissing “the list”, is a step toward a long-lasting relationship of mutual trust and respect.

As providers, let’s respect the list and the patients who took time to prepare it. Be kind. Listen. And respectfully, request another appointment when it’s needed.

As patients, let’s respect the knowledge of our healthcare team and the time it takes to provide adequate answers to our questions. Be kind. Listen. And respectfully, accept another appointment when it’s needed.