I know. I know. The holidays are over. But, I actually wrote this post on 12/26/2025 and have just hesitated to post it. Christmas was actually a really good time for us, and this post seems more depressing than intended. We’ve also been intentional about not letting cancer define us, so I didn’t want cancer to take one of my favorite holidays, too. Still, when I reread this today, I realized that the gifts of Christmas with cancer are too good not to share – after all, this is what we want to ultimately define us. So… enjoy.

---

On the 25th of December, our living room glowed with twinkling lights and shiny ornaments, smelled of pine and cinnamon-scented candles, and was filled with anxious voices holding on tightly to presents with their names on them. Our house was probably a little like yours.

But if you’re a little more like us, then between the hugs and smiles, you locked eyes with your spouse and wondered – what if this is our last “Merry Christmas?”

The reality is that we’ve been told to expect a prognosis of “years” from the treatment he’s getting now, so the odds are that we’ll have more Christmas mornings together. Then again, we were also told to expect he would tolerate chemo without many side effects – and for that, they were 100% wrong. It’s been a terrible two rounds. So, what if they’re wrong again, or simply being too optimistic about his prognosis? What if something else…? Then this Christmas with cancer may be all we get.

But what if…

What if having a Christmas with cancer is actually a gift?

After all, last year there were people who had their final Merry Christmas and didn’t even know it – didn’t get to savor it. Their future was stolen by death, divorce, disease, dementia, you name it. The cold reality of the world came for them as it eventually does for all of us. No one gets Merry Christmases forever. No one.

It’s a perspective that cancer gifts us. Getting a brain tumor diagnosis at age 41 has a way of grounding you. And, if the reality of the diagnosis doesn’t, then the radiation and chemo side effects will.

If mentally, you truly accept that the time you have is finite, and if physically, you only have an hour or two of energy each day, then things change. Priorities change. Perspectives shift. Your “To Do” list shortens. Your shopping list shrinks. Your calendar frees (even in December!). Slippers and flannel PJs get even more comfortable. And holding hands gets even more priceless.

In one of Jason’s low moments, he was lamenting about all he has lost – how he has lost normal hearing, lost normal vision, lost the ability to catch and throw well, bowling is out, typing is hard, walking is harder, and eating is a chore. The list of what we’ve lost keeps growing, and nothing seems to be off-limits. Cancer has taken our health, our hobbies, our money, our dreams, and our time. It’s unfair.

But what if it’s actually a gift?

What if things – stuff, busyness, vacations, and even our health, money, dreams, and time – aren’t that great of gifts anyway? After all, they’re all temporary. What if there are gifts, instead, that cancer and the world can’t take away? There are.

Here is our list of “Christmas gifts” that are, and will always be, off-limits to cancer:

• Purpose. Our story and our life will forever have a purpose, a reason—a reason that is beyond stuff, beyond careers, and beyond health.
• Love. Cancer has only deepened the love (noun and verb) here on this earth from and for our kids, each other, and our family & friends.
• Faith. Cancer has not shaken our faith in a God who is in control and eventually “wins”.
• Hope. Cancer has not touched our hope in eternity, in a new heaven, a new earth, and even a new body – hallelujah!
• Memories. Theologians could prove me wrong, but I believe the memories that matter will, in some un-painful, un-tainted way, be eternal.

Cancer steals so much. Christmas with cancer is hard. And, cancer gives so much. Christmas with cancer is a blessing.

The holidays this year gave us another chance to appreciate them all.

Merry Belated Christmas!

“Set your minds of things above, not on earthly things.” Colossians 3:2